Awaking the (A)rtist soul !!!

Thursday evening……… 

I am returning back from my work, as usual I am plugging headphones into cell and tuning into some radio channel , so that I can enjoy my evening walk to my abode!!! These days radio channels put up so many events for their publicity, conduct contests ….. and give away several prizes. Previously I used to always send my entries to some or other contests……but it never worked for me….so I stopped eventually!!! Wait wait…..RJ Meera asking people to send some sms , if people are interested to perform with the “navy band “ !( Oh my god it’s the Indian Naval Band !!!) My hungry (A)rtist soul is too eager be a part of it “please please ..i want to participate I wanna sing” says (A )soul. “NO” a big disapproval from my typical particular (C)omplicated mind…… it scolded …..asked to shut up and calm down!!!! 20 minutes passed ….. still Meera is asking for entries….this time …my hand is not listening to my ‘C’ mind, prioritizing my ‘A’ soul… sends an sms “I realy sing well” ! My mobile beeps for an sms from 5888 thanking me for participating in the contest!!! Day Ends!!!

  Friday morning….. 

 I am working ……learning rocket science or the submarine theories!!!! While coding, testing and preparing some documents simultaneously…I am overloaded with as usual …but that doesn’t effect my loyalty to orkut/gmail/google search !!!!

 My phone is ringing…a Mumbai landline number blinks ….same old stuff “mam I am calling from ******** bank..is there is any requirement for loan?” NO No Nooooooo there is not !!! Am again back to work !!!! 

Twenty minutes later my phone is again glaring a landline number…..

I reply very annoyingly… “#%^%$@! HEELO” ……” 

She: “Hi Prerana I am kreetika from Radio mirchi"

Me: Radio Mirchi ???? Oh hi…. She:: you have sent a sms to meera yesterday?

 Me: (me ???OHHHH..so it worked) Yes yes I did !!!

 She: We are taking a live audition…would u like to sing now??? 

Me: (Now??? Is she mad or what?? I am core to the crust of debugging and now she wants me to sing ) Actually I am at my office gimme two minutes please! 

She: Sure take your time baby!!! 

I am heading towards the parking porch…..yes its relatively noisy..but nobosy is around as such !!! 

Me: Yes…Shall I sing now??

 She: Definitely I am waiting!!! 

Me: Ok…(lets play my best shot !!) 

Tinka tinka zara zara hai roshni se bhara …………!!!! 

She: Awesome. ….you are too good girl !!! Why don’t you try your luck in playback??? I declare u the winner of this contest honey …..!! 

Me: Thankyou thank you very much……!!! (So now what am I suppose to do!!) 

She: you will perform with the “Indian Naval Band” tomorrow at Bandra!!!

 Me: wow!!! Thanks!!!! 

 I am back to rocket science and submarine theories !!!! 

Day Ends!!!! 

  Saturday Evening…………………… 

 I am here at joggers’ Park Bandra….. (My goodnesss it’s a huge celebration. I am not dressed as per the occasion!!! Now what!!! Anyway where are these radio mirchi people…I have to serch them !!! ….!@$@##!@##!&&%...oh there is a girl wearing a yello radio mirchi T shirt!! ) 

Me:Excuse me.... Hi...... I am Prerana…… 

She : Oh ...Hi.. I am Prakriti…….Welcome….here is the band and here are u…..so now u can practice !! 

The band was huge…they seemed to be at their best ….. and here I am ….. forgotten all the rules of music…. Day by day becoming a unbearable singer from a bearable one …. It has been long I have performed somewhere….… my last performance was in Raipur !!! and that also 2 years back…. !! 

Nowadays. I just sing for myself, my family and some of my selected friends ……really I am scared!!!! By the way in 30 mins my performance would start!!! 

In the end it was not that bad ( ya...some crazy people shouted for once more !!!! is it a joke or what ??? )!!! 

People praised and I got a small recognition in this big city of dreams ……!!!! 

Thanks Mumbai….thanks Radio Mirchi…..Thanks the Naval Band…..for awakening my (A)soul !!! For helping me to find its true spirit !!! 

  (Now I promise myself I will never ever loose it, Go Away you (C) Soul its time for A(Soul) to shine ) Day Ends

This Diwali....

Few days back we had a cubicle decoration competition at our office, theme was Diwali …as usual I also participated in it along with my team. We chose to decorate our cubicle on a different theme “Celebrating Diwali with a cause” (as we didn’t had many things with us to decorate it the way we wanted and by the time we started planning things…….other teams were already done with their decoration) .That event was a great success and we won the competition in the best theme category. The main reason for winning was the smart work we did by choosing a wonderful theme, where the tag line mentioned was “let’s worship and celebrate humanity this Diwali”. The main focus of our theme was to celebrate Diwali in a subtle way this year, as we Indians have faced main disasters in past few months …be it the serial bomb blasts in various cities or the floods in Bihar, current downfall in the market or the high inflation rate, every where we faced many natural and circumstantial disasters. So we maintained the theme and this Idea clicked. We won the competition!
The very next day was Diwali!!!
For the first time in my life I was away from home on Diwali, I was sad and upset due to this very fact of not being with my loved ones in the festive season….. I was alone and feeling very gloomy and decided to spent my day watching television…every channel was broadcasting some or the other reality shows wrapped in diwali flavor!!! By evening I was so bored and exhausted, so I decided to go out and feel the festive flavor in the air. I went to marine drive….. I love this place due to its uniqueness…. though its too calm but it has some kind of life in it….that day It was a different marine drive…every where there was beuty and bright lights people wishing each other, dressed nicely, children carrying crackers , joy and happiness flooding every where. Seeing so many people sooooo happy …I was also feeling very jovial and full of enthusiasm!!!! I saw people from all over Mumbai came there to celebrate this festival of light, joy and hope together….I also greeted some of them and exchanged sweets… I wan now not feeling lonesome ….meanwhile a very group of very distinct people attracted my attention…..they were wearing white/light colored clothes and were giving a white flower , a white lit candle and a white sweet to every one whoever passes by…. I was kind of exclaimed seeing this and went closer to ask what was the reason of doing the same, do they belong to particular community who celebrate Diwali this way or there is some other reason …. The answer which I got really made my Diwali a wonderful and memorable one !!!

They said “ We belong to that special community of people who worships humanity and believes in celebrating it….…this diwali we are trying to spread the thought of love, peace and sweetness in hearts” .

Survivor !!!

She was innocent, she was simple, she was fresh, and she was pure, unaware of the rules and regulation of the big ruthless world. She thought and believed that the world is as pure as the dew drop, she believed in trust, hard work, and dedication. She believed in “doing it right " and she believed in “if you have never harmed anyone no one can harm you”, she lived in her own fairy land surrounded by angels and fairies!!! But suddenly one day she landed in the world of “projects, bench, deliverables, deadlines, pressure, work culture, professionalism, decorum, analysis, innovative thought, quarterly ratings, confirmation, timelines, and guidelines”. She tried to cope up, in few months she realized that the whole project world was going through a disease called as “FAVOURITISM”!!!!” Initially it was not clearly visible to her rather she couldn’t realize it …..she thought this is also a typical human behavior and as she is new, she was unaware of the symptoms, she thought this a change in the environment and she should have an open mind towards the changes, because she still believed in her self-defined mantra “if you have never harmed anyone no one can harm you” along with the “Bhagwat Geeta” “you just perform your work rest will be taken care”. But there has to be an end of self-beliefs! Because the world surrounding her was living with the parasite “irrationality” which actually infected the world of projects, by Favoritism. This particular disease can push oneself direct to the top of Mount Everest in a moment, and in the other under the depth of Pacific Ocean. To survive the disease …….the most important needed medicine is a Godfather!!! No other side byes like performance, consistency, or intelligence is required!!! Because Godfather is so strong and effective that the effect of all these other things are just negligible!!!

So what she was hard working? So what if she was and sincere? What’s the big deal if she was efficient??? Did she have a “GODFATHER”? Was there anyone who can blindly favour her? Was there anyone who can blindly recommend her???

People came and asked her to fight for her true rights, asked her to make the gods of project world to be answerable….!!! She tried , tried very hard unaware of the fact that there also she will meet the giant favoritisms !!!!!

Today her life is normal and usual…though still today she doesn’t have any Godfather. Even today she doesn’t have her complete rights, she deserved, though today also she is not being praised for her good work and even today she is not recommended for responsibilities. But whenever she asks herself, what did she achieved by being honest, hardworking and a fighter???? What did she achieve fighting for her true rights????
Her inner core answers “Feeling of being a fighter and a proud survivor of the calamity called FAVOURITISM”.

Rethinking hope !!!

Today I got up at 8:00 AM in the morning …so it was a comparatively a late start….any way I picked up the news paper and went thru the headlines which was about the political crisis Indian government is facing ….all the fact and figures were exponentially derived by the analysts in the article but the main thing which attracted my attention were photograph of six persons who were claimed to play the key role for the future of UPA government. Currently UPA government is struggling to prove their majority in the parliament. All of them are Member of Parliament (MP) who currently are in prison. Most of them are accused of murder, gang war, illegal business and the list goes on an on, 50% of them are sentenced for life imprisonment. One of them is accused of murdering an I.A.S. officer. I was so shattered and shocked reading this, as now these criminals will decide the fate of a government which is said to be democratic “for the people and by the people”. I know this not for the first in the Indian history that any government is facing issues and also not very new or something special or unknown fact being shared…but still as a responsible citizen of this country I feel very sad.. very very very sad that what kind of examples are we going to set ??? I have always seen in several bollywood movies that the villain in the movie is a MLA (member of legislative assembly) or MP who is very corrupt and has a strong criminal background. He commits many crimes but breathes the freedom. And then there will a “hero”, who is a true Indian, whose veins flows country love instead of blood. He will fight against the villain (MLA/MP) and get back every thing to back normal and there will be law and order maintained everywhere!!! But I know life not cinema..nor these six people are villain of and movie … they are hard core criminal……in whose hand the future of the ruling party…….. lies. They will bargain their imprisonment for their freedom…and I am not sure but may be they succeed and set examples for their follower, how to use their power of crime!!! We all are very well aware that rate of crime and corruption in India is quite high but still, I feel we all Indians have some hope in our hearts that …..these conditions will improve someday. But these incidents make me think again to hope !!!!!!!

I am ready !!!

Life is beautiful…life is wonderful….Life is lyrical…its musical…….Life is Mysterious!!
I have many more definitions…..but right now I feel to say life is demanding and challenging.
Because from past few days I feel difficulty and hindrances …hurdles everywhere…
So what…..if its difficult to regain…and retain strength??
So what if its near to impossible to be 100% optimist and perfect??

I am geared up……geared up of every challenge…
Every challenge life has stored for me!!!
I know life has its own traits…!!!
Ready to face any thing be it…boss’s humiliation….…or be it friend’s acquisitions!!
Ready for being called irresponsible…..ready for all those agitations!!!
I am ready…even ready for all those 1000000 questions which I need to solve before November.
I am ready to do and die!!!
I am ready to face me and my!!!!

getting started

adopt your own virtual pet!

Self Actualization

These days I am relatively free at my work place…I work for the software industry where we are allocated to some project…and now a days whichever project I am getting allocated either that get scrapped or its release gets delayed. !!! Which gives me ample of time for myself…to carve my idle time into some useful stuff…like to chat in orkut or gtalk !![:P] even I can’t do these things properly as I am being watched by some or other person …….then the million dollar question is what should I do when I am “comparatively “ free at my workplace ?? Shall I spend my time attending some non relevant training?? Or shall “I explore the system “as suggested by them!!!! But despite of doing all these useful stuff I thought and lot to decide what I shall do…and decided to read some online books…I started off with “Princess Diaries” Meg Cabot …Once I started it..there was no looking back and I wanted to finish the whole series…I am still chasing this mission ..but a term used in this book inspired me a lot and that was “ Self Actualization” Like the main protagonist of the novel I also want to achieve “self actualization” And for achieving this state I have decided to follow the mantra of self respect !!
Self satisfaction and self respect will be my motivation!!! This is going to be my next mantra for pleasant and happy life…some months back I quoted ….”forgive and ignore” then my mantra…and found it quite successful for pertaining peace…so now onwards I will try to follow the second mantra…” Ignore and avoid “because its you and your family and your close niche of friend who is centre of your world … anyone out of that criteria should not affect me neither physically nor mentally, lets se how much I can follow this rule no.2 because I find it quiet difficult…
May be some day I will be also able to achieve “ SELF ACTUALIZATION”
I wish myself all the best !! So that I may achieve it !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

An unusual experience in a usual day !!!!!

It was like just another weekend..very usual.. I went for shopping to Crawford Market with my friend while coming back we took a train from churchgate for andheri as usual we boarded in the ladies compartment..it was not too crowded we were just moving toward our destination passing each station.. it was around 9:00PM my co passengers were of different ages, belonging to different communities of the societies…few were busy talking among themselves while few were absorbed by their headphones
( which is a very usual trends in metro cities…thanks to the radio channels and the mobile manufactures !!) Any way I also belong to this group but “unfortunately” I forgot mine at my home, so I was reading Filmfare(as it featured Shahrukh) and my friend was reading Femina ! Meanwhile a very unusual but pleasant sound grabbed my attention …… I saw a very young boy (aged around 15 years) was playing a bollywood number in his Instrument ….Being trained in Indian Classical music I am aware of most of the Indian and western musical instruments but this one was really very different…And I was unaware of the name. It sounded like but designed like Ektara…but it was not ektara as it had 4 strings….and that boy was playing it so beautifully that even if you don’t have a music sensitive ear then also you will find it pleasant….but as its there metro culture nobody was interested in his music as people were to busy with their headphones . After completing the first song he played the next number which was a purely based on Raag Lalit ( It was kind of dhun ) !!! I was so amused and astonished that I was hardly able to stop myself talking with him …but somehow I didn’t!!!! I don’t know why ? I don’t how did he played that piece but I must say he was really very good at that. And if you are really interested in some form of music..you cant let off yourself from it !!! Then my destination Arrived and I gave that boy some money and moved out of train heading towards my Home…All that night I kept on thinking that why these kind of talent are never nourished, Why this form of music will be just a side by for all of us ! I don’t know I could I have helped him, giving him some money will definitely help him fulfilling his daily needs but, I wish I can do something more for all these street child who have some or other kind of talent in them. These kind of talent really make me feel that if this raw then how will it be after processing !!

1 year in Mumbai !!!!

Mumbai....city of dreams, city of hope, city of new horizons, city of colors…..and many mamy more adjectives can be added but in a single world it can be metaphor as “Alive”. Here every thing has a life…an urge!!! Be it the terrific traffic or be it the overloaded local trains. The first time when I came to this city…I was 8 years old, it seemed too huge, crowded and dirty! I was lost in the local train….my parents were unable to get my down in that over crowded Mumbai local…somehow they managed to find me!!! That day.. I pledged to God..I will never ever come back in this ruthless city never ever !!!! But today after 16 years…I am here celebrating my successful 1 year stay in the city of creams and hope….I really love the city..I love its every mood.. be it totally damp and wet Mumbai of July or totally dry and hot Mumbai of April. Whatever be the climatic conditions this city is always to cool to explore…it never stops. that’s why I said its alive !!! what you need is just time to explore the place I bet you will be in love with it. It has its own charisma its own charm…its starts right from the Arabian sea..i will never say Mumbai has great beaches..or great sea shores to hang around..but the it has Nariman Point or Priyadarshini park cliff..both the place will give an entirely different mood and feel of the city Nariman Point is like a diamond which shines on after polishing it…where as priyadarshini park is a place which is so calm and quiet….if you go n visit worli seaface….its again totally different. Here you will find life and youthfulness . Oh how can I forget Aksa ..its a very ecstatic beach near Malad here Arabian sea is lit bit harsh..people say its dangerous ..but what I feel is its just like your childhood where u are completely carefree and innocent !

Mumbai..known as paradise for shopper’s. There is not a single street present in Mumbai where you won’t find small roadside shops selling very exquisite and exclusive stuff. Which you can only find in Mumbai…be it Crawford market..or be it’s the linking road of bandra..clothes …clothes and clothes all over….Its really heaven . If Zaveri bazaar is exclusive for jewelry…then khav gali is famous for Indian cuisines…if chembur market is famous for leather goods…then dadar is famous for flowers….really every bit of Mumbai has its own flavor and feel.

If you rreally wanna find some peace in you life…just spend some time at ISKON juhu.. I bet you will be feeling refreshed..and full of positive hopes. I do agree that Mumbai is overcrowded and too fast…but this has its own adventure and that’s the it is……

Every new day has some adventure in it…your everyday life is eventful when you are in Mumbai….I feel I can stay in any part of the world if I have successfully completed my one year here…Really Hat’s Off MUMBAI !!!

Forgive and Ignore

Life is really a big game...or rather to say a tough game....but this statement itself is very obnoxious or illusive in nature !!! because when we see or take life as a game....we are more concerned about the results... whether we win or lose !!! Due to which we start taking each and every small phase of life as an tournament. and when we think about those moments we react accordingly..depending upon the results....
When we were kid, we used to be the king of the house ! all our needs and necessities were taken care by some or the other person...whether we are hungry ,or we need to play...or may it be the simple case of nature's call there used to be some one to take care of it... then when we grew a little bit...those people surrounding us expected us to take care of pretty simple things...which they used to take care ! This is a simple transformations.. then we grew up a little more.. now we were expected to take care of each and every action of ours and expected to perform as per the social; rules and demands.. now it was the time every where we faced the challenge of survival for the fittest....................... And beyond our own expectation and imagination we survived... we survived for our own existence and for our own desire to be there...where we are.!
Now we know we are young, responsible for all the needs and deeds of ourselves...here we have to be not just ourselves but also themselves... I know this is quote is itself quite ambiguious,but I really believe it... I am a person who is very particular and specific by nature...Sometimes I have faced very awkward and abrupt situation due to this....and the root cause of those was my expectation from the fellow mates to be particular, specific in all those things which I used to... and when I didn't get them...I took it as a matter of life and death..a matter of win or lose....but now when I have faced several situations...I have not left my nature of being specific and particular ...because I think that's my USP..but I have learnt not to expect it, not to expect this from my surrounding, there have some time in my past when I have eradicated all my desire and needs in a day just due to bad or spoiled mood...which atlast effected me ...it was me who was always in loss..because, The person who cause this to me was totally unaware of his/her action, as it was not crucial for them as it was for me, I don't blame it to anyone !!! And believe me, it helped me a lot, a lot in living this life truly , the way I want to live it !!! I don't advice this world to leave their desire to turn into some one else but I just request this to all those person who love life and want to live it to fullest.
True mantra of living the life peacefully and without tensions is " Forgive and Ignore". Forgiving everyone for all those things which effected you and ignore ...because that will effect only and only you....finally the loss will be yours!!!

Soul !!!!

I am sad she knows that, I happy she also knows that...today i am chirpy like a school girl , few days back i was an old granny, Now I feel I am stucked in a quicksand from where I cant come out, but in the next moment i feel free like a bird..................
she is a silent observer of all my emotions rather i say all my rationally opposite emotions of which i am unaware most of the times.. i shout on her why this injustice is done to me? I cry to her why i am not the chosen one? I laugh loudly sometimes, on being appreciated....and sometimes ,sometimes i tell her i just wanna keep quiet and wanna enjoy solitude !!!....she never asks me why? She never demands anything to me !! she keep on experiencing me silently, she knows all i want is to express myself ....express my feelings,emotions and my sensitivity !!!!
I never ask her is she ok? I never even try to understand whether she is interested or not? me? I dont remember how my life used to be when she was not around me ! Actualy that can be just a state of mind ....in reality that cant happen !!!!! She is my soul....we cant depart !!!